Little Blue Life-Boats: Living On Mac and Cheese

About author / Josh Gunn

Bachelor chef; southern cooking; mixologist; university professor. Josh's recipes will delight (and sometimes terrify) you.

Here we are in week-three of our college preparedness for bachelors. Over the last two weeks we have discussed how to avoid the dreaded "Freshman Fifteen" and what items every bachelor needs for his dorm room. Now we are finally down the meat of things, or as the case may be, the meatlessness of things: how to eat and survive in the dorm room.

We've already covered cafeteria food and fast food, but what about make-your-own style food? What's cheap and easy? What anti-cafeteria cuisine can sustain a bachelor? Perhaps the most common answer is ramen, noodles that are prepared by adding hot, boiling water. But that stuff is so very nasty, so I have a better answer: Mac and Cheese.

Now, this week's column is in no way intended to be an advertisement, but we must admit that in the United States Kraft is the leader of make-it-yourself Mac and Cheese. We can blame the sheer ubiquity of the blue-and-gold box on Sam Kraft, who originally debuted his processed mac-n-cheese in a box as the "Kraft Dinner" in 1937.

You history buffs will recognize that these were the "pre-war" years, when there was major food rationing. Kraft thus introduced his macaroni and cheese dish at a time when meatless and low-on-dairy foods were somewhat in demand, thereby catapulting the "Kraft Dinner" on to the culinary top shelf. And the stuff was super easy to make: you boil elbow macaroni, drain, then add butter or margarine and this bright-orange, powdered "cheese." Stir stir stir and, wallah: you have a big bowl of mac and cheese!

Although I admit this stuff is not very good for you, it's filling, easy to make, and stores well---unrefrigerated---in a dorm room. Recently Kraft has introduced single-serving packets of mac and cheese that you can make in the microwave in no time. While I appreciate the ease, there's much pleasure in making the processed stuff right out of the box. Even better: there are all sorts of things you can do to "dress" your mac and cheese. Here are some things you bachelors might try to fanci-fy your blue-box cuisine:

Add hot sauce. My personal favorite college mac and cheese was the "deluxe" version that comes with gooey Velveeta brand cheese instead of the powder, to which I would add half-a-dozen shakes of Tabasco sauce. Spicy mac and cheese is delicious!

Add ground beef. I didn't do this in college myself, because I was in college before the pre-cooked, frozen ground-beef-in-a-bag existed. Nevertheless, this was one of my mother's favorite variations on mac-and-cheese: she'd season up and brown about a half-pound of ground beef, and then stir it into the mac-in-cheese. It was pretty tasty!

Add ketchup. Try adding various flavored ketchups to your mac and cheese; this adds a new, tangy flavor to the powered cheese to create, how does the phrase go? Oh yes: to create a "medley of flavor!"

Add weenies. You've heard of beanie weenies, but did you know another popular variation of mac and cheese is "mac and weenie?" Just boil (or grill) some hot dogs, slice, and stir right into your mac and cheese. This is both "low rent" and exciting, sure to please your dorm room guests.

Add canned tuna. Not a fan of tube steak (aka hot dogs)? Try adding a can of tuna to your mac and cheese. Another popular variation, "Mac and Fish" counterbalances the unhealthiness of processed cheese with the heart-benefiting boost of omega-threes!

Of course, these are just a handful of ideas to get you dorm bound bachelors to use your imagination. With a little bit of culinary creativity, there's almost nothing you can't add to mac and cheese. Of course, I'm not saying, for example, pineapple is a good choice. I'm just saying you can get creative if you try!